This is not advice and is meant as a comedy post.
How to NOT kill a computer, phone, or tablet.
1. DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT, take your computer swimming with you. It is a BAD IDEA.
2. Make sure NEVER to read a book next to a computer, the computer will get very offended that you are not reading on your computer. And if a computer gets offended it might self destruct.
3. Be careful when you are playing with slime and using your computer, otherwise you might get slime in the keyboard and then your b key won’t work anymore. If you do get pink slime in your keyboard your computer will start projecting a pink light, which is pretty actually, but probably will affect the resale value. Trust me, I’m typing from self experience.
4. Are you taking your computer on a date? Are you bringing it to the top of the Eiffel tower? Well DEFINITELY do not recite the titanic scene and then accidentally drop it….
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